Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Need Internet, Will Try Anything

Click on the button to hear my attempt to plug the ethernet cord that stretches into my room from the living room into my "roommate's" modem. [This will redirect you to the site where I'm hosting the file.]

Some background: I covered the red carpet at the International Emmy Awards last night, and needed to e-mail my event file to my boss at Us Weekly -- so I needed an internet connection. I noticed the ethernet cord in the room I'm renting from the lady I live with, but I found that, after follwing it along doorways and baseboards, that it was not plugged into the modem.

Since it was raining and the coffeeshop I ususally go to for internet access was already closed, I thought I would ask my roommate to let me plug HER cord into HER modem so I could plug it into my computer, knowing that she might flip out. But hey, she's already kicking me out, so what have I got to lose? I started recording our "conversation" after about three minutes.

This isn't on the recording, but the police came -- 3 of them -- and she shut the door in their faces when they showed up. Then they threatened to break the door down, and she let them in. They listened to her rant about how I have no right to use her stuff, then they took our information and left. The end.

I had to go to Noah Taylor's house to use the internet. Thanks, Noah!

6 comments:

  1. Sweet Jesus. "I don't know if she has any weapons, officer."

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  2. You poor girl, I'm just glad you're strong enough to keep on keepin' on. :)

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  3. I can't believe you persisted. Someone as non-receptive and insane as that is liable to pull a kitchen knife on you or some equally Jerry Springer b*******. Geez, Sarah, be careful!

    Are you out of this situation, yet?

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  4. "Go in there."

    Hmm. Where to start. When she said “in there,” was she referring to a cage in the corner with some hay tossed in it? A cage littered with poopie giblets? You know, where it sounds like you sleep.

    Also, you have the patience of a — well, I don't even know what to compare you to, Tea. I'm still trying to figure out whether you’re gluttonous for punishment or Mother Theresa.

    Some thoughts on this woman: It sounds like she hasn’t much more life to live. Or, if she does, her soul’s no longer with her. It died a bitter death many, many years ago.

    "Go in there. Go in there.”

    The sound of that voice arouses something violent in me. Yeah, something deep and violent.

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  5. I listen to this from time to time to remember what an S.O.B. you are in irrational arguments started by me.

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  6. Yeah, as an impartial observer, I have to say that it's pretty appalling the way you kept pushing.

    It's true that from a point of view of pure social efficiency, where the maximum benefit is distributed to the greatest number with the minimum difficulty endured, she should have just shrugged and let you use it. But that doesn't take into account at all the fact that you were obviously living there for a while and you two obviously hated each other.

    When you live with someone and are essentially incapable of escaping their company, the issue of territory is incredibly important. For you to just assume that her possessions were your territory was presumptuous in the extreme, and you should have known better than to expect a favor from someone who you were clearly on terrible terms with in the first place.

    It was fine to ASK for the favor of using her stuff, but the first answer of "no" should have ended the conversation. Did you really think that saying, over and over, "Can't I just have my way?" was going to change her mind?

    Maybe you did - maybe you thought for a while that she'd finally crack, the same way an exhausted parent might crack when their spoiled child screeches, "Can I have some candy?" for the thousandth time. But once it got to the point where you knew she wouldn't, it was nothing short of cruel to continue hammering away at her - and doubly shameful considering that you started recording it, perhaps with an eye towards posting it later on the internet for everyone to laugh at her. I mean, you hate each other and whatever, and she was a complete bitch to you, so you're justified in being a complete bitch to her right back. But I honestly don't credit you with any moral high ground here.

    I have no knowledge of your rental agreement, and you might have had some leverage there - but I agree with poor Erica that demanding its use with no notice late at night (for her) was not appropriate. You may have been technically in the right, but tactless enough in your pursuit of that right to deserve the refusal you received.

    The person who referenced me to your post said you love comments, so there you go! Best wishes and I hope you are well the fuck out of that household by now. Also glad that you ultimately got your critical data transmitted. Love, Z

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Go ahead. Make my day.