I'm a Basketcase

I thought my rental car got stolen last weekend. I called the cops; we "canvassed the neighborhood," searching for a red Toyota Highlander in vain for almost an hour. I went to the precinct and filled out Grand Larceny - Auto paperwork. The cops berated me for not having a New York driver's license. They took me to Avis, where I had to wait in the back of their car while they talked to the manager. I cried. A lot, I guess. I'm a weenie.

The car was parked across the street from my building, about 20 feet from my bedroom window. Two parking tickets.