What's That? You Need to Get Rid of a Dead Body?

Next time you're wondering how you can get rid of some unwanted items in short order I bid you to take this advice:

Ship it with Federal Express. It helps if you are shipping it to an aparment complex or a house on a busy street.

I shipped my luggage from NYC to LA (3 bags, including an over-sized Louis Vuitton overnight tote), and the delivery man left my stuff on the front doorstep, outside, in a common area, where it was -- can you guess by now? Surely you can.

Stolen.

The contents, aside from various material goods that were expensive but mostly replaceable, included every notebook I kept from my final semester in grad school.

Hold on ----I'm gonna cry ----- okay, I'm better. But trust me, there's a lot of Dewars in my life right now. More than usual. Especially late at night.

So my worldy possessions from my time in New York are gone, courtesy of Fed Ex. Apparently, this happens a lot. [Google "Fed Ex stolen packages" and you'll see what I mean, but only do it if you want to be depressed.]

Anywhoodle, if you're moving or doing spring cleaning and discover that you no longer need a wide variety of household items, just pack 'em up and ship 'em with Fed Ex. Your stuff will be disposed of, and if it's stolen, you don't have to pay for shipment. It's like having the junk yard come and pick your junk up for you. Voila, and you're welcome.