Kim Zolciak launched her official blog yesterday, prompting millions of people to ask, "Who's Kim Zolciak?"
I kid! You know everyone's secretly hooked on The Real(ly Retarded) Housewives of Atlanta. I know I am. NENE I LOVE YOU!!!!!
Incidentally, Kim is not even married. Just sayin'.
Anywhoodle, Kim was vacationing in the Bahamas for the holidays and found the perfect opportunity to remind everyone that her "30-year-old" [AHAHAHAHAHAAA!!] figure is so hot that people just flock to photograph it. To wit:
Yes, she "found" some really posed photos of her in a bikini that "somone" took of her on a beach in the Bahamas. Sure.
Any young female celeb/Matthew McConaughey goes to beach all made up and artificially tan and just "happens" to get photographed, golly gee! Who knew that I'd have my picture taken in this little bathing suit with my hair and makeup done???
Look lady, that's the oldest, OLDEST trick in the book (see Kardashian, Kim), right behind getting married to a person of the opposite sex so adoring fans and Hollywood casting directors don't know you're actually a homosexual (Will and Jada, I'm looking in YOUR direction).
Let's just hope she doesn't play a loop of "Tightrope" on the site.
I kid! You know everyone's secretly hooked on The Real(ly Retarded) Housewives of Atlanta. I know I am. NENE I LOVE YOU!!!!!
Incidentally, Kim is not even married. Just sayin'.
Anywhoodle, Kim was vacationing in the Bahamas for the holidays and found the perfect opportunity to remind everyone that her "30-year-old" [AHAHAHAHAHAAA!!] figure is so hot that people just flock to photograph it. To wit:
"Recently I vacationed with my two girls for the Christmas
holiday's in the Bahamas and found some photos that someone snapped of me while
at the beach."
Yes, she "found" some really posed photos of her in a bikini that "somone" took of her on a beach in the Bahamas. Sure.
Any young female celeb/Matthew McConaughey goes to beach all made up and artificially tan and just "happens" to get photographed, golly gee! Who knew that I'd have my picture taken in this little bathing suit with my hair and makeup done???
Look lady, that's the oldest, OLDEST trick in the book (see Kardashian, Kim), right behind getting married to a person of the opposite sex so adoring fans and Hollywood casting directors don't know you're actually a homosexual (Will and Jada, I'm looking in YOUR direction).
Let's just hope she doesn't play a loop of "Tightrope" on the site.
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